Retrospective Week

Some Retrospective Dreams of this Week

No Commitment

I met this Caucasian woman that I really liked in a friendly way. We were kissing. It was still friendly rather than passionate, but I went down and started kissing around her groin. She pulled me up gently and smiled, saying that if I did that it showed too much commitment and she'd rather stay friendly, so it was better to kiss her mouth only.

Interpretation

Not much detail to go on, but probably just stating that I don't like to get so close to people.

Dreams of Last Night. I had a little dream after about an hour of sleep, but was really tired and just scribbled something down which I can barely read, but I'll include it anyway.

I was on the budget airline Easyjet with _________ (my notebook shows a straight line here. I don't recall it, but I imagine that would be Junko), and missed by (unreadable word) as had to go back for ticket.

I went into Kennsington (an expensive part of London) and it was pouring. I hid in a pub. (unreadable word) left phone number and the waiter called him/her (last word ambiguous).

Interpretation

Well I can't be sure what it was about. In my half-sleeping state I've also written three words at the end, which are: easyjet, missed, paged.

My guess is that it's about missing Junko, missing my chance, and now being hesitant to contact her or know about her, but secretly thinking of getting a third party to find out for me (technically known as stalking (what am I saying!!!)) (Just because you think about something doesn't mean you'd do it).

I had another dream just before waking proper, which was better remembered and better written down.

I was with my mother in her old house which is currently being sold. Somehow, perhaps because of me, she had been roped into cleaning an old piece of leather for someone. She was obviously clueless how to go about it and it made me laugh as her ametuerish attempts were quite endearing.

Interpretation

This one's much easier. For more than the last decade of her life, my mother did everything she could to support and encourage me. Now I'm left with pretty much nothing, just some last money and I have to try and study and build a life. As I'm doing this I've been starting to wonder whether it would have been better to have less support (read mollycoddling) and have to look after myself a bit more, then I would have perhaps achieved more along the lines of what I'm now trying to do at this stage.

But I was pretty weird, always, a lot of problems. Perhaps I wouldn't have coped at all. the fact is I'm still here at least. Mother didn't ask to have a son like me with all these issues and problems and wasn't an expert in knowing what to do, but did her best I suppose -- and the dream says to appreciate that rather than play a game of 'what if' or pushing blame around.